The holidays can be a difficult time, whether you're in the middle of making an adoption plan for your baby, or are still thinking about it. You might be worried about nosy questions or rude comments from your relatives.
Are you worried about going to family celebrations with your baby bump showing? Today, Lifetime is giving you completely honest tips and ideas for surviving the holidays.
Your relatives will probably ask you questions if you're clearly pregnant. They might ask about your plans for yourself and baby. Some may offer to throw you a baby shower and freely give parenting advice. This makes telling them about your adoption plans really awkward! At the end of the day, it's your choice who you choose to tell about your decision to make an adoption plan. Here are some tips that might help you:
Some birth mothers just skip Christmas gatherings and celebrations with family. What's important is to take care of yourself and your baby right now. The reality, things are not as usual this year, so it’s hard to keep carrying on with life as usual.
Create Answers Ahead of Time
If you know you're going to get prying questions like "do you have the nursery ready?" or even "are you sure you're ready to become a mom right now?!" it may help you to brainstorm answers ahead of time. Before you go to the holiday celebration, create answers such as "I've got time to think about what’s going to be best for my baby. So for now, I’m taking it day by day."
Tell a Professional
A trusted professional will be able to help you to identify which people in your life you might tell. They can also help you practice telling others. Think about talking with a counselor, to get ready for any negative opinions you might face about your decision.
Prepare for Reactions
You may get different reactions from people when you tell them about plans. Their reactions might make you feel confused, or guilty. We encourage you not to take negative reactions personally, as hard as that might be. Family members who disagree with your decision, are often genuinely concerned for you and baby. If they have questions about the adoption process, you might suggest that they speak with your Adoption Coordinator.
Surround Yourself With Positivity
Try to surround yourself with people who are supportive of your decision. Remember, Lifetime offers one-on-one peer counseling: women who have been in your shoes and made an adoption plan. It might help you to talk to someone about your feelings. Since our peer counselors have gone through the adoption planning process too, they're able to share tips about how they survived the holidays.