Many birth mothers have shared with us that after their adoption plan had gone through, their lives changed. Women who choose adoption can plan ahead for how they'll handle those changes and adjust to life after adoption. In this post, we share tips from real-life birth moms on what helped them.
Give yourself time to process what you've been through. This can be a healthy, healing time if you're honest and loving with yourself.
Below, 5 women who made an adoption plan through Lifetime give tips for life after adoption:
"Don't shut down. At times I felt so alone. Trusting a couple close people to listen to or be a comfort really helped. My adoption coordinator was also a big help after the adoption. She arranged for me to talk with a counselor and with another woman who chose adoption. It helped to talk with people who understood what I was going through."
"Ask for help. Sometimes I felt like I had to have all the answers. I learned to reach out before I felt overwhelmed. Speak up when you need information, a helping hand, or direction for the next step. People want to help."
"Focus on the good. I thought about the reasons I chose this plan and of all the things I gave my son through adoption. It helped knowing I would stay in touch with him and his adoptive family. I like knowing they think of me and that I'm a part of their lives. It's like we're a big extended family!"
"Write a letter. It helped writing to my daughter and her and her family, even if I didn't send it to them. I'd write about my feelings of love, my dreams for her, why I was thinking of her, what I want her to know about me or my family...whatever was on my heart."
"Have patience. I had to give myself grace to go through things at my own pace. I took time for my feelings and experience. Through my daughter's adoption, I learned to be kind to myself and set healthy goals for my life."