Adoptive Families Blog

How to Encourage a Healthy Open Adoption

Posted by Mardie Caldwell on October 17, 2019

When most people think of adoption, they imagine adoptions of the past when closed adoption was the norm. Society's views on adoption have evolved over the years, and now most private or independent adoptions are open adoptions. In fact, only 5% of infant adoptions are closed, according to a 2012 survey of 100 private adoption agencies.

What this means for you is that more than likely, you will have an open adoption with your child's birth mother. 

There are varying degrees of contact in an open adoption arrangement, from emails sent through an adoption professional to annual in-person visits. Open adoption comes with many benefits for everyone in the adoption triad: adoptive parents, adoptee, and birth parents.

Birth parents know that open adoption does not mean that you share custody. You are the parents, and they will respect this. They simply want to know how their child is doing and that they made the right decision. I've seen so many great open adoptions and wonderful birth mother relationships. You should be open and honest about the amount of involvement she will have with the baby. 

By setting healthy boundaries, the adoption experience will be a happier one for you, your baby, and the birth parents. Keep reading to learn about open adoption agreements, the hospital experience in open adoption, topics to discuss with your child's birth parents, and more!

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, visit with birth family, open adoption visits, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?, open adoption agreement

Lifetime Couple's Podcast Shares What They've Learned in 3 Infant Adoptions

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on August 22, 2019

Ever wish that you could hear from someone who's "been there, done that" and recently experienced an infant adoption firsthand? When you initially begin the adoption process, it can be very overwhelming. Hopeful adoptive parents benefit immensely from hearing what adoption was like for others.

Hearing other parent's adoption stories provides encouragement, along with invaluable guidance and tips as you navigate the unknowns of adoption. One of the best things that hopeful adoptive parents can do is to learn from others who have gone before them on the same path! Why not learn about infant adoption while you drive to work, do housework, or go for a run with a podcast?

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Adoption Tips, Infant adoption, Adoption story, adoptive dads, how to afford adoption, what is open adoption like?, domestic infant adoption, affording adoption, adoption podcast, Infant Adoption Guide podcast, Infant Adoption Guide

"His Adoption Was Without a Doubt Part of God’s Plan!"

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on July 2, 2019

Last year, adoptive couple Casey and Johanna were blessed to adopt a baby boy through Lifetime Adoption.

In this family’s story, we hear from Johanna about receiving "the call," the bond they've established with their son Isaiah's birth mother, and their experience with becoming parents together through an open adoption. Now a forever family, adoptive mom Johanna shares their beautiful story in this special guest blog. 

We love it when adoptive couples share the happy ending to their adoption story after the wait.  It’s a beautiful reminder for Lifetime of why we do what we do and the impact it has on creating families!

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Waiting to Adopt, adoption wait, Adoption story, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?

How to Show Your Love to Birth Parents

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on February 14, 2019

Birth mothers have a bond with their baby from the start. She’ll wonder what her child will be like, how she’ll care for him or her, and what she’ll need to give her baby the best she can. And sometimes this means making an adoption plan.

It’s a difficult, heart-wrenching choice to make, but it’s one made out of love. A birth mother loves her child so much that she wants to give them a better life; one that she’s unable to provide. After the adoption, she’ll think about her child often and love them for the rest of her life. Adoption is a choice made out of love.

So in honor of her love, this Valentine's Day we're sharing seven ways to extend love to your child’s birth mother!

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Communication, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?, gift for our child's birth mother, forever family

Get a Real-Life Glimpse Into Two Types of Adoption

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on January 24, 2019

"Our relationship is very near and dear to my heart, and I sincerely love these women. 
Their sacrifice allowed me to grow my family!"

Adoption relationships can be easily misunderstood, until you see them through the lives of actual adoptive families and birth parents who came together for a child’s adoption.

Today, we hear from Lifetime adoptive mother-in-waiting Emily; she shares about her relationships with their sons' birth mothers. You'll discover how open adoption allows for a flexible and respectful relationship between adoptive families and birth mothers!

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Adoption journey, Waiting to Adopt, Adoption story, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?

How to Deal With Fear About Birth Parents

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on January 17, 2019

Many adoptive families fear relationships with their child’s birth family. They are unsure of how it will impact their relationship with their child. Patricia Dischler, author of Because I Loved You, helps adoptive parents understand what it means to have a relationship with their child’s birth family. Today, over 90% of domestic adoptions are open adoptions, with relationships between birth families and adoptive children.

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, visit with birth family, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?, is open adoption co-parenting?

"We’re forever thankful for her birth parents' sacrifice and love!"

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on January 3, 2019

Oftentimes, Lifetime connects with adoptive couples in the midst of their route to parenthood, at a crossroad where loss meets the possibility for positive things ahead through adoption. In this post, Lifetime mom, Lisa, shares how she and her husband Frank moved from infertility to adoption.

In this family’s story, we hear how Frank and Lisa moved through their adoption wait to a match and embraced the opportunity open adoption gave them to develop a friendship with their daughter’s birth parents.

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Adoption story, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?

"Every smile, giggle, and coo was designed by God's perfect plan!"

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on December 12, 2018

Earlier this year, adoptive couple Derek and Jennifer were blessed to adopt a baby boy through Lifetime. In this family’s story, we hear from Jennifer about receiving "the call," the bond they've established with their son Elijah's birth mother, and their experience with becoming parents together through an open adoption.

Now a forever family, adoptive mom Jennifer shares their beautiful story in this special guest blog post!

Because we live on the West Coast, I wasn't surprised to hear my cell phone ring as the sun began to rise over the mountains.

As I pulled my phone closer and tried to focus my blurry eyes, I saw the call was coming from Grass Valley, California. I held my breath as I answered knowing that Lifetime Adoption called with "good news" outside of business hours. My husband and I listened to the voice on the other end of the phone intently. She spoke of a birth mother who chose us to raise the precious child growing inside of her. We listened carefully to every word and detail and soon learned a baby boy was due in just over three weeks.

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Newborn Adoption, Adoption story, what is open adoption like?, adoption experience in the hospital

She Gets it from You: Author’s Letter to Daughter’s Birth Mother

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on November 27, 2018

Recently one of Lifetime’s adoptive moms introduced us to author Melissa Radke’s book, Eat Cake. Be Brave., a personal testimony of faith, courage, accepting one’s strengths and unique path in life, including infertility, miscarriage, and adoption. In Chapter 19, Dear Miss Danielle, we were moved to read Radke’s heartfelt letter to her daughter’s birth mother. This real-life encounter with modern adoption, as seen through an everyday adoptive mom (with a great sense of humor and ability to share words as if you’re talking with a friend), will speak to so many of our followers and families.

If you’re a hopeful adoptive parent, or if you’re already raising a child through adoption, you’ll be touched by this excerpt from Chapter 19 of Eat Cake. Be Brave. Perhaps you’ll identify with the hard emotions each side of a child’s adoption face as they come together for a match. Or you’ll anticipate the great love that you’ll have for the ONE mother who chooses you to adopt her baby, and how you hope you can find just the right words to tell her how much she means to your family, how much you admire her brave love. You might even read this as a birth mother, and be reassured that you are not forgotten, and some of the brightest things about your child will remind his or her adoptive parents of you in the best ways.

Because of modern adoption, a child can grow up knowing that she inherits good things from both sides of her story.

With permission from Melissa and David Radke, we are honored to share this letter to her daughter's birth mother excerpt from Eat Cake. Be Brave. with you below.

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, Adoption Book, Adoption story, infertility to adoption,, books about adoption, what is open adoption like?, modern adoption, Christian adoption book

A Healthy Open Adoption Needs These 6 Things

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on September 19, 2018

Decades ago, almost every adoption was closed. Back then, people thought that closed adoption was best for the child. Today's adoptions look much different. An estimated 95% of domestic adoptions now have some level of openness between adoptive parents and birth parents. 

Even though there are varying kinds and levels of openness in open adoptions, there are healthy traits that many have in common. Here are 6 traits that adoptive families should strive for in healthy open adoptions:

 

Read More

Topics: Open Adoption, adoption tip, relationship with birth mother, what is open adoption like?