Adoptive Families Blog

Get 7 Tips on How to Support Your Loved One's Adoption

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on October 3, 2018

support-loved-oneThe goal of today’s post is to help improve your family member's and friends' understanding of how adoption works today. If they wish to share in your adoption experience, this information can serve as a starting point for conversations about how your adoption will touch everyone.

We encourage you to share this post with your loved ones!

If someone you care about is hoping to adopt, you become part of their adoption circle by supporting them. As such, you’ll need insights and information about adoption. Whether you’re experienced or unfamiliar with adoption, this blog post will be beneficial. We encourage you to as you participate in their lives as an adoptive family.

Here are 7 ideas on how you can support your loved one during their adoption journey:

1. Find out more about open adoption

Modern adoptions happen quite differently than they did 50 years ago. With open adoption, the birth mother chooses the adoptive parents for her baby. Both parties stay in touch as the child grows up. Let your loved ones know that you're trying to learn more about open adoption.

2. Don’t judge

Part of the adoption process is coping with emotional highs and lows. It can be difficult to see a loved one struggle. You might feel tempted to offer them your advice. But even though you think you know better, it’s their journey. So, keep an open mind and avoid sharing your opinion unless they ask for it.

support-loved-adoption23. Offer a listening ear

They may look like they've got everything under control. But adopting a baby can be unpredictable, so they might run into some rough patches along the way. Even though you might not always understand what’s happening with your loved one, you can still listen and be there when they need you.

4. Don’t attack them with questions

Since adoption is new to you, you'll probably have lots of questions, such as "How long is the average wait?" or "How do you find a birth mother?"

While there’s nothing wrong with asking questions, don’t overdo it. Your friend or family member may not feel like answering them. This especially includes the most annoying question of all for waiting adoptive couples: "Any news?"  Believe us, if your friend or family have any news on their adoption, they'll tell you when they’re ready.

5. Keep horror stories to yourself

If a couple is expecting, it's not kind to remind them about a story of the botched delivery or congenital disabilities. Give a couple who is expecting through adoption the same courtesy. Just because you know someone who had a bad adoption experience doesn’t mean they'll have one too. No two adoptions are alike, so let things unfold the way they're meant to.

6. Remain open to learning

It’s natural to feel lost when you start to learn about adoption. So, keep an open mind and be willing to grow your knowledge as you support your loved one’s adoption journey. A great place to learn more about adoption is by attending free webinars! We hold webinars that are open to the public a few times a month. Visit to sign up.

7. Ask how you can help

Offer to help them out with their adoption by providing a reference letter for their home study or profile. If you're talented with photo or video, then you could take pictures or tape videos for their adoption profile. You might also help out by sharing social media posts about their hopes of adoption on your Facebook or Instagram account. Adoptive couples will also appreciate offers to help them clean their home for the home study visits or watch their children when they get "the call"!

It's a beautiful thing when someone you care about is giving you the opportunity to participate in their adoption. With these 7 tips, you'll be able to lovingly and effectively lend a helping hand. The things you do to help your family member or friend during their adoption wait will be much appreciated and be remembered by them for years to come!

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Topics: Open Adoption, Adoption Tips, Support adoption, modern adoption, family member is adopting