Birth Parents Blog

Tackling the Holidays as a Birth Mom: Grappling Through Grief and Loss

Posted by Guest Contributor on December 18, 2018

Adrian C. Collins is both a birth mom and an adoptive mom, and she writes and speaks about the complexities of adoption. In today's guest post, Adrian shares real-life tips on getting through grief during the holidays, as a birth mom.

Our family is a huge fan of the CBS television show, The Amazing Race, where teams embark on a trek around the world to compete for a one million dollar prize. At every destination, each team must compete in a series of challenges, and only when the tasks are completed will they learn of their next destination.

In one challenge, partners were asked to play a round of volleyball against professional players in Estonia and only had to score five points to complete the challenge before finishing that leg of the race. Some assumed the challenge to be a breeze. What teams didn’t realize, was that they were playing volleyball in mud. The mud was so deep it rose to players’ waistline and so thick it caused participants to become stuck. As the opponents balls whizzed past, contestants could only stand in one place. They became entrenched by circumstances. 

As a birth mom, I’ve often felt wedged by grief during the holiday season. A million little things are whizzing by—and I’m grasping for joy, peace and love—but instead I feel anchored by loss. Unable to move. Unable to catch my breath. Unable to celebrate.

Read More

Topics: Holidays, adoption and loss, adoption grief, contact with my baby, why do women choose adoption?, postadoption depression, post-adoption, life after adoption

Why Did I Choose Adoption? Out of LOVE

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on December 7, 2018

“I fell in love with Matt my junior year of college and was very sure we’d be together for the rest of our lives. When I realized I was pregnant, I was soo happy at first. All of the love I felt for Matt went right to my baby.

But then, reality set in. How was I going to raise a baby, attend all my classes, write papers, study for finals, and keep a part-time job? How would I pay bills and pay for everything the baby needed on a part-time paycheck?

After meeting with a counselor at a pregnancy center in our town, I came to realize that adoption was probably going to be the answer. At first, Matt was totally against the idea, but later came to accept it when he realized we weren't ready to be parents.

Even though my relationship with Matt didn’t work out, I'll always have so much love for our daughter, Sophia. She was created in a beautiful light and I truly believe God was protecting her from the start. She was an absolute joy to carry, to give birth to, and to love. My connection and love for her will always exist. When people ask me why I chose adoption, the answer is simple. Out of LOVE!"

Read More

Topics: adopt out my baby, why do women choose adoption?, modern adoption, Open Adoption

The Top 5 Reasons Why Women Choose Adoption

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on October 12, 2018

If you’re dealing with an unplanned pregnancy and thinking about open adoption for your baby, you’re probably wrestling with a lot of questions. One that might come up, again and again, is simply, "why?" Why choose open adoption? What are the reasons why women choose adoption for their child?

The truth is, there aren’t any simple answers. At the end of the day, making an adoption plan is a personal choice that every woman needs to make on her own.

Birth mothers today decide on adoption out of love. They choose open adoption because they’re putting their child’s interests before their own. Today, we're exploring 5 common reasons why pregnant women turn to adoption:

Read More

Topics: why do women choose adoption?, adoption for my baby, choosing adoption for my baby, open adoption questions, Open Adoption

4 Reasons Why I Chose Adoption for My Baby

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on March 20, 2018

"My son is my heart and soul, and I think about him every day. I love him so much, more than anyone else. I carried him for nine months, and so he'll always carry a piece of my heart. When I was giving my baby up for adoption, so many people were against my decision. They asked me why, if I love him so much, did I choose adoption?

Read More

Topics: adopt out my baby, why do women choose adoption?, adoption for my baby, choosing adoption for my baby

Why Would I Consider Adoption?

Posted by Lifetime Adoption on October 10, 2017

Question: I just found out I'm pregnant, and I'm freaking out about what I should do. I'm don't think I could go through with abortion, and I don't know how I'd make parenting work. So I'm wondering what are some common reasons that women choose adoption?

Answer: There are tons of reasons women choose adoption instead of parenting or abortion. For whatever reason, right now they're not ready to parent. 

Lifetime has helped birth mothers of all ages, from 11 to 49! Here are a just a few of their reasons for choosing adoption:

Read More

Topics: unplanned pregnancy, Adoption for my child, Adoption help, unplanned pregnancy options, why do women choose adoption?, adopt out my baby