If you're thinking about adoption, you've probably also thought about the father of your baby. Is he "dad material"? Has the thought "maybe we should just get married and try to make this work" crossed your mind?
Start by being honest with yourself about your relationship. Marriage should come from being committed to each other, not just because you're having a baby together. Think about what kind of home life you want for your child.
Keep reading for 12 important questions to ask yourself when you're wondering if he's "the one"!
Marriages shouldn't be out of convenience, but out of true love for each other. If you're getting married for the wrong reasons, and with a baby coming soon, the odds are against you. Statistics show that couples who get married because of an unplanned pregnancy have a higher chance of failure than marriages based on a solid foundation of love, faith, and trust. Some of the questions we list below might feel like no-brainers but stay with us.
Here are 12 questions to ask yourself about your baby's father, so that you can avoid making a hasty decision:
- Is he going to be a good role model to your child?
- Can you picture yourself growing old with him?
- Is he responsible? (Can he hold down a job, and pay bills on time?)
- Has he ever cheated on you?
- Does he party a lot, do drugs, and/or drink too much?
- If he has other kids, what kind of a father is like?
- How do your family and friends feel about him?
- Has he ever been arrested or served time?
- Do you feel safe with him?
- How do you feel about your daughter marrying a man just like him when she grows up? How do you feel about your son growing up to be just like him?
- Has he ever verbally, physically, or sexually abused you?
- When he says he'll do something, does he follow through?
Being a parent is a hard job, and it takes a lot of stability, maturity, and sacrifices. Are you sure that the two of you have what it takes to get through an unplanned pregnancy? If not, adoption is a great alternative that gives your child the chance to grow up in the best of environments. An adoptive family can give your child stability, security, and a healthy image of a loving marriage.